Weeks of April 10 – June 1 - Special I'm A Lazy Blogger Saddled With A Relatively Uneventful Life Edition!

Alas, my faithful followers, I have not deserted you. Instead this dearth of blogging updates has been the result of several key factors coming together at the same time. A perfect storm, if you will, of laziness, and a life that is often times boring with few exciting interruptions. I will attempt to reconcile my failings as a consistent blogger by updating you all on everything I can remember, and a few things I can’t. Ready? Here we go!

One of the biggest things I can remember happening was Easter, when Nicole came home for a few days. A good time was had by all. We had the traditional gathering at Grandma’s house, accompanied by the traditional spread of food that could have fed a whole army. My family only forms up to a solid company strength, but I think we took apart the buffet pretty efficiently. Personally, I learned that one of the most dangerous places to be is right in front of a open bowl of M&Ms. The bowl will empty itself faster than you can imagine. The traditional Easter egg hunt operated on a new set of rules this year, including opposing teams hiding eggs on opposite sides of the yard, then trading and trying to find as many as possible. The side of the yard I my team had to hunt in included a large and unfriendly thorn bush complete with flowers the same color as the eggs being hidden. This provided a huge and unfair advantage to the other team, but I console myself in knowing that at least one of my eggs went completely unfound. While Nicole was home, I took the opportunity to stretch my culinary legs and try some stuff I don’t usually make. Nicole has always been a fan of a lamb dish I made years ago, but not having the recipe anymore made replicating it somewhat difficult. Instead, I took some help from the adorable Rachael Ray and tried a lamb dish of hers, and it turned out far and away better than I could have expected. It was her Road to Morocco Lamb with Pine Nut Couscous if you so desire to look it up and give it a try.

In other historical happenings, I went to see “I Love You, You’re Perfect, Now Change” at TBPAC with Mom and Dad. It was the last of the tickets Katie and I bought before the opportunity to go to California came up. The only other show I had seen was “Wicked” when Katie came home before, and otherwise I had been giving away the tickets to other family members. I am extremely happy I went to this one, though, as it was probably the funniest public spectacle I have seen in a good long time. It was a show with four people chronicling the many foibles and follies of courtship, dating, marriage, families, and ultimately old age. I think my favorite skit was the one about a man whose wife and kids run his life, until that magical time when he gets behind the wheel of the family station wagon, and that is his time in charge. Absolutely hilarious.

In addition to these pleasant incidents, there was also some stressful time with my cat. He got himself a bladder infection some how, and it took about $600 and a variety of tests administered by a group of vets to determine that it was not life threatening. Happily he seems to be back to normal, such as it is. He still drinks beer, and despite having 16 years of experience under his rather sizable belt, he is still endlessly fascinated with shoelaces. One of the more colorful turns this recent medical drama took was to a holistic vet, but I just call him the Hippie Doctor. His office is all the way up in wacky Dunedin, and after poking and prodding Tiger for a few minutes, he pronounced him to have an energy imbalance that was manifesting itself as a bladder infection. The solution? An envelope of pills clearly labeled “energy” and another simply titled “for kidneys.” Yup, that’s about the size of it. I give Tiger a little of each twice a day, and the crazy thing is, it seems to have worked. Next thing I know Tiger will be demanding a hemp collar and organic cat litter.

Those are the only paragraph-worthy events I can remember right now, and the rest will have to be shoehorned into a nice wrap up paragraph. Work is going well, as always. Al, the other Aprons guy, started a cooking class at work, and I lent a hand with that. Apparently I did such a fine job that the class participants requested I have a class of my own. We’ll see how that works out. I have started Beta testing ways to leave the house without having my hair plastered to my head. I don’t quite know what brought about that change, but it seems to be working out nicely. I have registered to take the LSAT on June 12, so everyone cross your fingers. I was rather late in signing up, so I have to go all the way to Sarasota to take the test. I went with my cousin Ronnie to see “X-Men The Last Stand” the other day. Personally, I was horribly disappointed. The movie didn’t look or feel like the other two, which I feel were masterfully done, and even some of the characters behaved differently. I was not a fan at all. Finally, after many months of exercising, I am happy to report that I can now make my pectoral muscles bounce on command, even independently of each other. “Tasteful” does not even begin to describe it, but I do plan on updating my resume.

That’s just about all I can remember from the past bunch of weeks since I wrote last, which leaves up with just one more thing:

Winners & Losers

Winner: Bill Crosson, for graduating and getting himself a job in the corporate world. I wish you best of luck, and hope that the same fate that befell Dilbert and that guy from Office Space does not happen to you.

Loser: Kevin in the produce department. He didn’t know that there really is no such thing as a dingleberry. At least not something that even a well-stocked produce department will ever have on hand.